Real Steel

Omg, where do I even start...
Real Steel might have been one of the worst movies, if not the worst (well, there was Soul Surfer...) of the year. It has big machines, annoying child, Hugh Jackman as an asshole father and no point of existence whatsoever. I have no idea why this film was made, because having a budget like this and a big ass robot, I can think of so many other scripts that would work better than Reel Steal. I don't even have to think about them, to be honest, because Cracked.com has already done so:
http://www.cracked.com/blog/9-better-uses-giant-robot-from-real-steel/

                   There are also ways in which you should never use robots, you creep


In Reel Steel, Hugh Jackman is a robot trainer of some sort and spends his life participating in robot vs bull fights as well as being a neglectful father to his only son that to be honest, I would myself neglect for being the most annoying child in the history of cinema. Of course he is made to spend a summer with his son and obviously their relationship changes rapidly as soon as Hugh Jackman discovers the boy's talent. And what is it exactly? The fact that the boy is able to restore an old generation robot? The fact that just by playing video games he is able to control the big machine? The fact that he is able to communicate with the robot? Or the fact that he is inhumanly powerful and is able to drag himself a full three ton heavy robot for a very long distance up the hill, in the middle of the night after almost losing his life?

If you think, these were impressive, you don't know anything about impressive. According to both Max's father and his girlfriend as well as the whole robot fighting audience, the most amazing thing about Max is his
annoying dance.

It's been a long time since I've seen something THAT irritating. Congratulations, movie

After discovering that his son is so good at robot dancing (literally), Hugh Jackman decides to give him a chance at the real competition, where some redneck punk guys get overexcited about beating some ten year old kid's ass. Although Max's robot is old, he manages to win all the fights up to the point where he meets Zeus- the ultimate robot killing machine that no robot in the entire world has ever beaten. It is designed by a hot japanese guy and run by a hot russian girl. And you probably have guessed, who wins this fight...

It is not that I can only be entertained by an emotionally deep film, because I have to admit- I like robots. I loved Terminator, I liked Transformers (I risk loosing my press pass by making this declaration, I'm aware of this), I like I Robot, I liked half of the A.I. I like brainless entertainment very often and sometimes it is enough to show me some badass special effects (Mr. Cameron) in order to make me a happy bunny. But this happy bunny can turn into a Monty Python bunny when watching so called movie about a friendship and love and forgiveness where the only persuasive character is dr pepper. By the way, has anyone noticed how many dr peppers there are in the entire film? I haven't seen that many in tescos and it's a large tescos I live next to. And it's not just doctor pepper that they put everywhere. Real Steel seems like it's trying to beat Michael Bay's record of the amount of product placement in one scene. And it works. I will never drink Dr Pepper thanks to it.

Reel Steel 1/10